Friends are important.
School is about learning, discovering, making friends and learning how to get along with others. Sometimes our kids have to learn to deal with a bully and it’s not fun, for you or your kid. My children have had to deal with bullies a few times already.
It's hard to confront a bully
I sought out advice from several teachers, mothers and a psychologist about the best way to deal with a bully situation. From my own children’s experiences, I believe communication is of the utmost importance, an adult should be informed to help the child deal with the problem. With one of my children, I had no idea she and several others in her class were being bullied for two years till another class mother told me. I was upset that I hadn’t known and I asked my daughter why she hadn’t told me about the abuses she suffered at school. At 7 years old her response was “oh mama, it’s so embarrassing!” She had dealt with the bullies on her own by fighting back, she’s a tough cookie.
Kids can be very mean to one another.
Children often don’t want anyone to know that they are being bullied for fear of being made fun of, shame or reprisal. The parent of the bullied child should not initially confront the parents of the bully; this takes power away from the bullied child which can further distress the him/her. The teacher is usually the most important problem solver in a case of bullying. I went to the class teacher in all situations and I informed the teacher as to what was happening outside of the class room, but on school grounds. Teachers often opt to talk with the class about what’s going on and sometimes a weekly class discussion time is implemented to talk about problems, thoughts or concerns of the students. I found that these discussion times were helpful for the children. Teachers often have no idea bullying is occurring and they should be told. If the problem can’t be solved by the teacher talking to the bully, the teacher should have a meeting with the bully and their parents.
One of my children reacted with tears, the other one reacted with her fists.
If a child’s teacher does not step in and deal with the problem for whatever reason, seek the help of another teacher, counselor or principal at the school. If no one at the child’s school takes a bullying situation seriously and fails to act upon the best interests of a child, you may consider changing schools. Just because a teacher intervenes and parents have been informed doesn’t mean that the problem will always go away. Children often need outside help to learn to deal with aggression, talking to a therapist is a good way for a child to learn social coping techniques. I told my children that they need to stand up for themselves; this seems obvious to me, but not always obvious to some children. Learning to deal with a bully is a skill that one will use their entire lives; I’ve run into plenty of bullies as an adult. Bullies are not always peers, teachers can also bully students, we have encountered this problem as well. After my husband and I learned that our child didn’t want to go to school and was very stressed out because of what went on in the class room, we set up a meeting with the principal and the teacher to inform them that our child felt intimidated by the teacher’s yelling in the class and from insulting comments that the teacher made to the children. Sometimes just telling the teacher how you feel about his/her actions in class is enough to get them to stop or at least tone it down a little. I’ve found that many parents are afraid to speak up.
childhood friends
For a parent, knowing that your child is suffering at the hands of another is frustrating and at these times I think most of us would like to step in and “do something” about it to help our children. Stepping in (for example, informing the teacher) is one thing, but acting for our children (for example, speaking to, yelling at, threatening) the child or children tormenting our children is unacceptable. Parents are offended (rightfully so) when other parents reprimand their children. I’ve seen parents become hostile about a bullying situation, screaming at the offending child, the child’s parents and even the teachers for not being able to control the situation; these people were later banned from the school grounds. Each case is different and should be dealt with as so. Parents are not always open minded (sometimes downright blind) to the idea or fact that their “little darling” is bullying another child and they become defensive (sometimes nasty) when told so, this is why letting the school authorities handle the situation is a better idea for everyone. I am happy to announce that my children have come through all their challenging social situations and we’re working our way through the new ones that come up. The best piece of advice I can give is, when “a situation” arises, take a deep breath before you proceed.
world map playscape
Playscapes are toys meant to give the fertile minds of children a place to romp. I thought maybe a playscape could also be a means of learning and a way to make learning more fun. How many times have you copied the map, whited out the names of the countries and oceans and given it back to you child to fill in? My playscape has no names so your child can learn to recognize the shapes of the continents, oceans and seas.
playscape figures: ship, tree, mountain, dune, fish, volcano
I figure you can make a game out of the playscape, play figures and suggested areas for discovery. With the help of an adult or older sibling, two or more can play the game. One player should ask where the Sahara desert is (for example), the other players will place their dune on the area they believe the famous desert to be. If you’re right, you get a point, and the player with the most points at the end of the game wins. The adult or older sibling can help the other players research certain areas of interest on the Internet or on an atlas, further explaining the list of places suggested for discovery. I needle felted the little play figures to help mark the special areas like deserts, dunes, volcanoes, forests, oceans, seas, lakes, rivers, plains, islands and mountains. I made a list of five of the most well known in each category, as a guide for discovery. The little ship sails the world, discovering interesting places.
world map playscape and play figures to make world exploration fun
I haven’t studied geography in years and I really enjoyed the research I did for the location card. Not too long ago, I was in the United States shopping for groceries. I struck up a conversation with the check out clerk and bag boy. They asked me where I lived, I told them Israel. They replied “Israel!, isn’t that like another country?” Let me tell you, there is a need for a game like this!
needle felted world map
I think this could be good cocktail party game for adults too, let’s call it World Traveler. If you find the suggested location, you get to do a shot and the winner is the one who can find their way home at the end of the game!
The map comes rolled with the playing pieces inside
Needle felted gnome couple
I‘ve become acquainted with gnomes, popular in Waldorf-Steiner education circles and with people who have high esteem for all things natural. The gnome stories (originating in Norway) tell of the good deeds of the benevolent gnomes, the keepers of animals and nature. The folklore of gnomes teach many skills, similar to those of a farmer or pioneer, living off the land, dependent and respectful of the nature around them.
- Needle felted gnome, family man
As I read the book Gnomes by Rien Poortuliet and Wil Huygen, I was amazed at the detail in which life skills were described. The gnome lore talks about so many of the skills that Waldorf-Steiner schools teach their students, skills that are today rather rare in the western world, like basket weaving. I admire that someone wants to teach children artful crafts that no one needs to do anymore, like bake bread or make your own toys out of things you find around the house. Even more so, I’m impressed with the parents who still find these things important and see value in them. You’ll never find a gnome child playing with a Wi or listening to their i-pod, they’ll be playing imaginative games and making their own music on an instrument and their parents will be there with them delighting in the merriment. The beauty of the Waldorf-Steiner methods teach a child how to use their imagination, thus how to think.
Needle felted Lady Gnome
The mother gnome takes on a very traditional role in gnome lore, I didn’t see any tiny, pink brief cases or mini designer suits hanging off a hook in the illustrations of their homes. When I was a little girl, my family lived a very gnome-like life, but we were all much taller! Maybe gnomes are so popular with those of us who value doing and making things ourselves because we’ve been bombarded with popular culture, plastic throw way everything, mindless musical lyrics and a sense of ho-hum with the things around us.
Needle felted belt buckle detail
I remember a furniture store in Chicago where all the pieces were made by hand by artisans, I often went into that shop just to be around the furniture (I couldn’t afford to buy a candle stick in that shop). I could see the hand crafted details in the furniture, the natural wood was rubbed with bee’s wax that gave it a rich, mat finish. I could see the time and skill and genius that went into making the pieces in that shop and I admired the abilities of the crafts-people. But maybe that’s just me, because I’ve seen many people who will buy what ever is on sale, no matter the piece. I know that in every gnome household, the furniture looks just like the pieces that I admired long ago on Clark street in Chicago.
The needle felted gnome family
Today there seems to be a backlash against consumerism and the throw away culture of the western world as seen in the resurgence of handmade crafts (Etsy) and the green movement. I think all generations have nostalgia for the past and admiring the make believe world of gnomes give us the sense that we may be moving back toward something more meaningful and useful in our lives.
